Warrior = redemption

This movie is heavy with meaning, and symbolism.  The powers of bitterness, brotherhood, forgiveness and redemption are woven intrinsically together to make for a great story.  The ending holds the key to this great movie.  Two brothers forced to fight for prize money, one brother seeking both vengeance and understanding, the other offering forgiveness and love.  And the father that witnesses both from the sidelines, as he cheers his sons on.............

First favorite quote of 2012

 "I can see through the woods of the world: God is always good and I am always loved." J.J. Packer

Closing the wardrobe doors

Finally we are coming to the end, closing the wardrobe doors on The Chronicles of Narnia. This was our Christmas present to our boys last year, we have done a lot of reading to ourselves and each other. Judging from postings on Facebook and Twitter, and the constant texting I see going on around, I am judging that most of America is reading these days. And so in this age of cell phones and Google, I hope a Christmas letter is still a welcome addition to the mailbox. Along with the wardrobe doors, another year is fast coming to a close, and I have to say I look forward to 2012 with some mixed feelings. Elijah is now in first grade (LOVING it), but now his growth is more exaggerated by grades, and 2012 means second grade, and Gabriel entering kindergarten (I am not sure my heart can handle it)

2012 also means I will be “40”, not too sure how I feel about that either. 2011 has been good to us, and we to it. John donated his appendix in May after suffering from what I thought was “constipation” pains. My husband sold his Frankenstein vehicle, the VW wagon, that he spent most of the winter reconstructing, and then shouted in the spring, “It is alivvvveee”. I will say John has given a lot this year.

We have added 2 more mouths to feed to our monthly budget. Two laying hens, Reba our dominant orange, yellowish Americauna, and her counterpart Taylor Swift, a black and white accomplice. We are now seeing the fruits of their labor.

John spent the summer painting, and putting the finishing touches on our house. It has gone from a dirty white aluminum to a sagey green, with orange accents. We love it!

Our 10^th anniversary (say it isn't so), came and went in June, with a getaway trip to Mackinaw Island near the upper peninsula in Michigan (thank you Grandma Cindy, and Grandpa Gary). We had a great time reconnecting, and seeing a new part of the country.

We have had the privilege to attend two great concerts of our favorite artists JJ Heller and Leeland, both of which encouraged, and convicted.

I was given a great book by Ann Voskamp, titled One Thousand Simple Gifts (thank you Lisa). The book is written around the definition of eucharisteo, embracing those things we are thankful for. This book has been on my mental radar this year, challenging me to be thankful in spite of circumstances. I love Christmas, and all that it entails, and yet I let frivolous details, and burdens take on a life of their own. Ann Voskamp says, that “Whenever Christmas begins to burden, it's a sign that I've taken on something of the world and not of Christ...Christmas cannot be bought, Christmas cannot be created. Christmas cannot be made by hand, it can only be found.” This holiday originated in a simple dirty manure filled stall, on a cold night, “the hinge of history swung on the door of a stable.” “Jesus did not enter to vaulted domes, or marbled floors, He isn't antiseptic, carefully avoiding dirt, grime and stink. He intentionally decided to clothe himself as a naked baby and birth his virgin skin onto a mucking bed for animals...God chose a barn as His entry point. “ I want to rediscover for myself and my family what is simple and magnificent about the Saviour of the World coming to earth, putting on flesh and saving my life. My intent in this age of Google and Facebook, is to send a Christmas letter to remind us that we must marvel that Jesus came, just like God said he would, and He split history in two, forever transforming the concepts of hope and peace and salvation. I need this reminder, that Christmas is more than frenzied lists, tree lights, and gingerbread cookies. “Christmas is not a date, it is a state of mind, and heart” Where is your heart this season? For Jesus did not come to be served, but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many. We are thankful for you this year, for each other, and for our faith in an unseen God. We know that God has great purposes and meaning for your life...............and we know that wise men still seek Him!

Merry Christmas

John, Jenni, Elijah, Gabe, Chubby, Greta, Reba

and Taylor

Fascinated, and saddened

The Sovereignty of God is the biblical teaching that all things are under God's rule and control, and that nothing happens without His direction or permission. It is a mysterious, wonderful quality.  This weekend, the 10th anniversary of 9/11/01, was a time of remembrance for me.  I sat glued in the evenings, watching every special I could about the tragedy that unfolded on television.  I listened to endless testimonies by loved ones, and friends.  The History channel, ran a program dedicated to the phone messages that were left, heartbreaking is the only word I can find to describe what I heard.  I didn't hear many messages left with regards to seeing loved ones again in the next life, and this saddened me more.  I want to leave that hope when I die, that I will see my friends and family again.  I have spent much time in reflection, about how God chooses us, you and me to carry out His plan.  I came across this video on Facebook yesterday.  It demonstrates to me what Psalm 90:12 says, "Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." 

Many times

I have heard this song a gazillion times over the years, I love Tracy Chapman.  I remember when the video for Fast Cars began playing out on everyone's television, thanks to MTV.  Prior to kids, when John and I were able to come and go as we please, we sat in a field in Shelburne, Vermont waiting in the rain for you guessed it...Tracy Chapman.  She was amazing, opening the concert by walking out with only a guitar, singing Say Hallelujah.  Her songs are captivating, and meaningful, especially now.  A sister of an old friend from high school recently passed, bringing close to my mind thoughts of mortality, and youth.  She was young, 41 when she passed, the cause unknown to me.  She was a senior when I was a lowly freshman starting in band.  The news of her death brought memories back from that particular time in my history.  Memories of jelly shoes, and shoulder pads, Men at Work, and hot summers practicing at band camp.  Those days were laiden with ambivalence, and timelessness, and few worries.

My small family of 4 sat the other night listening to Pandora while we ate dinner, and on came Tracy Chapman.  This song, quiet and meaningful began to play, and I as listened to the words, really listened, I fell in love with the lyrics.  It resonanted with me, in light of the news of my friend's loss, losing her only sibling, her sister.  I prayed for her, and will continue to do so.  Having only one sibling myself, a sister, I would want and need those prayers.  Thank you MTV for introducing me to the girl with dreadlocks, and a daschund..........

Blister free

I highly recommend this book for anyone wanting to hike the Appalachian trail without the blisters, sweat and tears.  This book will transport you to the journey through trees, brooks, over mountains and through storms, each time you pick it up.  Along the way, you will heal, be challenged, cry, and feel refreshed.  I feel changed after reading this book, not only in my knowledge of the culture of hiking the Appalachian trail, but in where my faith lies, and how God chooses to reveal His character.  So lace up those boots, plant them on a footstool, and travel the Appalachian trail blister free!

My latest controversy.......

Where my heart is today

Christmas letter for 2010

I have no lofty or impacting stories to tell this Christmas letter. I can say that our family is healthy, we have a roof over our heads, and great food to place on our table. Our focus this past year has been on growing our faithfulness to our Saviour, and growing closer as a family. We developed a family mission this summer which now hangs in our dining room, it goes something like this....”In this HOME, we read, listen, bike, hike and CLIMB. We are travelers. We like Annie's macaroni. We argue, pray and forgive. GOD PROVIDES. We dance, take walks, and sing. We count our trials as blessings. WE DO ART. We like hot chocolate. We like maple syrup from trees. WE ARE JESUS FOLLOWERS. We practice hospitality. We TRUST in the Lord. We delight in the changing seasons. We LOVE!”
Elijah and Gabe continue to find balance in their roles as brothers and sons. We are learning by trial and error, not to parent them out of fear (thank you Pastor Neal). As time allowed this summer, we escaped Mount Vernon for a trip to the Smokey Mountains to rough it a bit in a small cabin. Great times had by all.
John is undertaking another project of restoring an older VW wagon, right now only he can appreciate the hidden beauty! After many hours spent researching, John built his own kiln, and since then has reacquainted himself with his love of pottery. He has starting making and selling clay tiles at a local art gallery. God continues to provide sick people for me to take care of, and the wisdom to know how to meet them where they are.
As we come into this season of Christmas trees, warm cookies, and hallelujah choruses, we are thankful for our friends and family both far and near. We look ahead as a family at 2011, and realize the hope that we have to give, the hope of purpose, and meaning, and love, the hope of Jesus. We remember the reason for this important time in history, a time filled with turmoil, angels singing, and the birth of one who would change the course of history. So I end this letter and ask you to hear the voice of Linus on stage with one light shining.
"'And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly
there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.'"
"......That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown."
In this time of need, both physically and spiritually, know that you are prayed for by us. God places each of you on our hearts and in our minds at different times throughout the year. It is during these times whether at work, praying before meals or in the middle of night, that we stand in the gap praying for His mercy and grace in your lives. May you feel His presence in the coming year!
Merry Christmas

John, Jenni, Elijah, and Gabriel

The most popular song

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"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares...
we have already come.
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...
and Grace will lead us home.

The Lord has promised good to me...
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be...
as long as life endures.

Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
and mortal life shall cease,
I shall possess within the veil,
a life of joy and peace.

When we've been here ten thousand years...
bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise...
then when we've first begun.

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

I love this song, I love it even more sung by Judy Collins. I acquired at a young age, a cassette tape of Judy Collins, complete with "Send in the Clowns", and "Amazing Grace". I would stop, start my recorder listening carefully to each verse and word, writing them down, and then memorizing them so I could sing along with Judy. My real life opportunity came to sit front and center at a Judy Collins concert, and what song did she close her concert with....you guessed it "Amazing Grace." I sat memorized, as did the whole room. People mouthed the verses along with her, tears filling the audience regardless of beliefs or lives lived. I have come to realize what a bridge this song is, it reaches people everywhere. It is the most frequent song at funerals, Sunday to Sunday, the lyrics are brought forth in churches. I have tested my theory while bathing older confused patients. I have noticed if I start humming this melody, and then break out into verse, they will most often join in, connecting with the familiar tune. I have bridged the age, and life gap. Thank goodness for that beloved cassette tape, and learning the most popular song, what a difference it has made in my life and others.

Friends or Family

I sat the other night with an older lady as she wept. She had come to see her dying friend one last time, and say goodbye. I listened, reassured her, and then thanked her for being such a great friend. I reminded her that it is a privilege we are given to choose the friends who grace our lives. We are not given the same benefit with family. We are born into a group of people, no choices, no one giving us options. All this to say we are not consulted when our family divorces. I felt fortunate when my folks ended their marriage, because they waited till I was 21. I skipped the whole drama custody hoopla. I am however struggling now, probably more than ever at 38. I lay awake at night wondering if my past, my childhood was real. Do I remember things differently to insulate myself? Divorce is strange in that it interrupts your future, shatters your present, and makes you question your past. I am not suffering any longer, but my own children are the losers, and that is where my struggle is. I pray fervently for my own marriage, that God will preserve the life we are building as parents, and partners. I pray that He will allow me to break the false patterns of my childhood, and help me rise to the occasion of being a positive example of the light and glory of my Lord. Thank goodness we can choose the friends who grace our lives, Lord give us the wisdom to choose wisely. And Jesus knelt down and whispered.....thank you for being such a great friend.

You will hear of rumors of wars

This month is always significant in the life of my family. Significant in the fact that my uncle died at the beginning of this month due to injuries sustained in Vietnam. I had never given much thought about the process involved in bringing the body of a dead soldier home. So I rented this HBO film, not sure of what I was going to see, and all I can say is remarkable. Remarkable in the fact of all that the United States does for the dead men and women who return to U.S. soil. I have never held to a firm stance or opinion regarding the wars going on over in Iraq and Afghanistan. I pray for the men and women fighting over there, for their families and friends who remain here, hoping for a safe return. I follow the new stories of casualties, and embrace hope in Matthew 24:6, "for you will hear of wars and rumors of wars, see that you be not troubled..". This movie changed my view of America, and how people like myself feel about the war, we are proud. In turn I am proud of an uncle I never met, but knew where his heart lay...on American soil.

What became of my dishes

I love antique stores and flea markets, the thick smell of dust and age, rust and metal. As soon as my feet walk over the thresh hold, I feel transported into a different time and age. I love the memories that float around, and timeless stories that are attached to each and every object. Antiques are reminiscent still, that nothing goes along with us when we die, "Store up your treasures in heaven, where rust and moth are unable to destroy." Antiques help us appreciate human invention, simpler ways of life, and demonstrate to us how far we have come in lifestyle and manner. One of my favorite films is Dead Poet's Society with Robin Williams. At the beginning of the movie, the students are taken into the foyer of the school to view some old photos of former students and athletes. To quote Mr. Keating, "They're not that different from you, are they? Same haircuts. Full of hormones, just like you. Invincible, just like you feel. The world is their oyster. They believe they're destined for great things, just like many of you, their eyes are full of hope, just like you. Did they wait until it was too late to make from their lives even one iota of what they were capable? Because, you see gentlemen, these boys are now fertilizing daffodils. But if you listen real close, you can hear them whisper their legacy to you. Go on, lean in. Listen, you hear it? - - Carpe - - hear it? - - Carpe, carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary." The memories that float on dusty air, were created by people like you and me, who had no idea their prized dishes, photographs and hutches would one day offer up the sweet aromas of dust and age, rust and metal, challenging us to simpler ways to live and love.

Just because

Yeah for Pandora

Here is a word of support for one our favorite listening venues in the L household. We love Pandora, and the way it offers hundreds of stations of fun, love and dance. Our latest listening craze has been the children's folk song station. Elizabeth Mitchell is gaining a great following here as we gather to listen while enjoying our breakfast.

"We have not inherited the earth from our Fathers. We are borrowing it from our children."

In this house

Hangs this picture

Which says this.....a reminder of my family's mission......
"In this house, we read, listen, bike, hike, and climb. We are travelers. We like Annie's macaroni. We argue, pray and forgive. GOD PROVIDES. We dance, take walks and sing. We count our trials as blessings. We do art. WE like hot chocolate. We like maple syrup from trees. WE ARE JESUS FOLLOWERS. We practice hospitality. We trust in the Lord. We delight in changing seasons. We LOVE!
Thanks Emily for your desire to serve and to push us closer to the cross!

Take a look

I saw this movie for the first time a few days ago, watching while trying to avoid concentrating on the treadmill I was walking on. This movie captured my attention. Not everyone will appreciate it as I have. I came from a family of hardworking people, you worked for what you wanted. Frank Goode is a hardworking father of four, a widow, who heads out across the country to see and surprise his children one by one with a visit. His journey allows him to see the landscape, take pictures, and tell people about his life as a lineman, coating telephone wires in plastic. He visits his children, and realizes something alarming, yet significant about each one. The story ends with a touch a sadness, but closure......take a look.

How far away!

How far away I have been, at least that is what I have realized about myself these past few weeks. Far away in thought, about God, my marriage, my children, and my life. My stronghold or anchor has been my growing faith, ever growing, always. As I look over my shoulders backward at the past, and then turn around into the present, I realize today how much closer my relationship to Jesus has become, how close I feel to Him. I see myself stretching and changing, things that were fuzzy before are now clear. Daily I ask for wisdom, and so it is to this I give credit where credit is due. I remember the veil, that thin piece of life that shrouded me before I accepted the Lord as my Saviour, and I remember the moment it lifted. Another veil has lifted, a layer of judgement and lack of information. Being married and having children has caused me to reflect on my own upbringing. I can not imagine my life, marriage or bringing up my children without a spiritual focus, I do not know how my parents did it. I was fortunate to have everything a child/teenager, could ask for or need. I was disciplined sharply, and was raised with morals and values, and mac and cheese, but Jesus was missing. I now see how vital that key ingredient of faith is to home and family. The focus of holidays was never on the true meaning, but rather the glorified worlds view. Meals were never opened in prayer and thanksgiving. Our home at times was filled with worry and fear. So now I focus on my home, and I look at how different my life is, and am thankful that though Jesus was never invited in when I was a child, He always stood at the door knocking.......welcome home!

Great quote

Vengeance is the lazy man's way to mourn